Personal Counselling Links and More Information
Please note that some of the links here will take you away from the UNB Saint John website.
Academic pressures
Feeling academic pressure can come from personal and environmental factors. Personal factors might include ability and knowledge in how to handle stress and your expectations and beliefs about yourself and the world. Environmental factors might include family and other relationships, how time is managed and other external factors such as finances and health.
Knowing the academic calendar and relevant add/drop dates and exam schedules, the University policy on plagiarism and cheating and policies on academic appeals processes are helpful tools to support adjusting to academic pressures. The Writing and Math Help Centres are free resources for students seeking course-specific support, as are the Student Development Coordinator and your academic advisor. Tutors can also be arranged for course-specific help.
You can also make an appointment with a counsellor in student services to explore alternative options or discuss personal factors influencing academic pressures.
Want further reading?
Emotional Fatigue: Coping with Academic Pressure
Academic Pressure: 5 Tips From an Expert on Coping with School Stress
Adjustment to University
Adjustment to University might include staying motivated, making new friends, and trying out a number of new and novel things. Adjustment might also include a period of grief, settling into a new routine, and working out new strategies for time and space. Many students also need a little time to adjust to expectations of accomplishment.
Acknowledging achievements, developing close relationships, and enjoyment can support adjustment to University. You can also make an appointment with a counsellor for a little one-on-one encouragement.
Want further reading?
Surviving University
Boost your motivation with this creative activity.
50 Questions to Get to Know Someone
Alcohol
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An online booklet entitled "Rethinking Drinking" with information on drinking, your health, and making changes.
Anger
Anger is a natural and normal response to feeling threatened or thinking that something is unfair. Sometimes anger is based on our past experiences, or our expectations, or other unpredictable things in our environment that cause us to feel “on guard". This emotional response sometimes can feel emotionally or physically overwhelming.
Exploring alternative ways to manage anger, along with relaxation and communication tools, are often counselling goals for students with this concern. You can make an appointment with a counsellor to discuss individualized strategies related to anger.
Want further reading?
Anxiety, Overwhelm, Stress. Worry
Anxiety is the body’s way of responding to feelings of being in danger. Experiences of overwhelm, panic, stress and worry can all result in generalized feelings of anxiety.
Noticing the body, mind, and emotional reactions to stressful events, and working on strategies to soothe these overwhelming experiences is often helpful in reducing anxiety, overwhelming feelings, stress and worry. Sometimes simply debriefing stressful events by making an appointment with a counsellor is helpful.
Want further reading?
Acceptance of Thoughts and Feelings
Observing our Emotions Reduces Anxiety
Four Steps to Stop a Panic Attack
Assertiveness, Communication, Decision-Making, Self-Esteem
Communication can affect feelings and relationships with friends and family and is one of the most complex of all behaviours. Developing effective communication often involves reflective listening, recognizing nonverbal ways of communicating, and practice using “I” messages.
Assertiveness is a way that people communicate their wants and needs, to stand up for oneself while at the same time respecting the rights of others. Learning assertiveness means practicing identifying your own needs and also practicing language that communicates directly what you are trying to say. Assertiveness also means practicing ways to say “no.”
Chocolate or strawberry? Decision-making is an important skill, but challenging, as there is no perfect formula for every situation. Critical thinking, values, courage and caution are a few of the complex facets of decision-making. For a wonderful overview of decision-making challenges and how to address some of those challenges, click here.
All of these issues are closely related to self-esteem. Very simply, self-esteem is the set of feelings that you have about yourself. This article explores the challenges of self-esteem and self-acceptance.
Want to practice with someone? Make an appointment with a counsellor.
Want further reading?
What is Assertiveness? A 7-minute video
The Fluent Self- A blog about becoming unstuck
Depression
Feelings of depression often include extreme exhaustion, demotivation, and a sense of hopelessness or worthlessness. Depression may also result in physical symptoms such as changing habits of eating or sleeping, and behaviours such as less interest in participating in things that we enjoy.
Looking at ways to boost physical and emotional energy and become re-engaged, acknowledging achievements, interests and close relationships, and enhancing enjoyment of life are some of the things that you can expect when working with depression. Make an appointment to see a counsellor if you are noticing that you are not feeling like yourself lately.
Want further reading?
Eight Tips for Boosting Your Energy
Disordered Eating and Self-Injury
Disordered eating describes a range of food-related behaviours, including dieting, compulsive or binge eating, and extreme control over food and food intake. Disordered eating is considered a self-harming behaviour and is often accompanied by anxiety or extreme overwhelming (internal anchor) or recent or historical incidents of trauma (internal anchor).
Self-injury is any kind of self-harm that a person causes to her or himself when they are experiencing overwhelming feelings. Self-injury is not suicidal behaviour (anchor to suicide); rather, it is a coping strategy for managing intense emotions such as anxiety or sadness.
Addressing the underlying feelings causing self-injury support those managing these concerns in feeling more safe and stable, enhancing stress management and finding new ways to enjoy the world and celebrate accomplishments. Speak with a counsellor if you are experiencing these feelings or want to make a change in your life.
Want further reading?
Separating your true identity from your eating disorder
Video excerpt from Women, Food and God
Emotional Instability
Emotional instability might include feeling overwhelmed, having difficulty controlling or managing emotions, or experiencing extreme emotional ups-and-downs. Emotional awareness, brief techniques to relieve extreme emotions, and strategies for managing overwhelming thoughts and feelings provide pathways toward emotional stability. You can make an appointment with a counsellor to discuss individualized strategies for emotional stability and distress tolerance.
Want further reading?
Emotional Instability Self-Help Program
Dealing with Negative Emotions
Expectations and Perfection
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Where are you on the perfection scale?
Want further reading?
Fear
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Grief
Grief includes feelings of suffering, sorrow and pain due to loss. Any type of loss can cause grief, such as moving to a new town, the death of a friend, family member or pet, relationship changes or divorce, and even health changes such as chronic illness or pregnancy. Finding a safe place to process the complex emotions associated with grief, remembering and mourning the loss, and reconnecting with the community are areas where most people feel soothed when experiencing grief. Make an appointment with a counsellor if you would like to explore this area of your life.
Want further reading?
Creative Ways of Managing Grief
Working with Chronic Illness (blog)
Moodjuice Self-Help Bereavement Guide
Relationship Issues
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Relaxation
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Sex, Sexuality, Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity
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Study Skills, Stress Management, Procrastination
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Suicide
Suicide is a troubling topic, but an important reality. Suicide is often the result of extraordinary circumstances including substance misuse (especially alcohol), serious physical illness, prolonged depression or recent or historical traumatic life changes.
If you are reading this because you or someone you know is considering suicide as an option to managing intense and complex feelings, the priority is preserving life by calling 9-1-1 for immediate support.
Other alternatives for speaking to someone about suicidal thoughts and feelings are calling the Mobile Mental Health Service at 1-888-811-3664 or make an appointment to see a counsellor.
Want further reading?
“If you are thinking about suicide, read this first” A note from friends in Australia
Trauma
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Other Mental Health Links
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